Do you believe in Happily Ever After? The poets did!

Do you believe in Happily Ever After? The poets did!

Over ten years ago I set out on a mission. I was inspired by Pride and Prejudice — the beautiful love story as portrayed on the silver screen with Keira Knightley and Matthew Macfadyen and within the pages of Jane Austen’s novel — but also by my own love story of over thirty years. Beginning in 2006, I embarked on a quest to intimately reveal a happy marriage.

The pearly treasures of the sea,
The lights that spatter heaven above,
More precious than these wonders are
My heart-of-hearts filled with your love.
~Heinrich Heine, “Of Pearls and Stars”

 

Tragically in our modern era, the concept of a “happy marriage” is far too often deemed a fantasy. The phrase itself is viewed as an oxymoron. While divorce statistics may seem to prove the case, I do not believe marriages growing stale or ending badly is a given. I never have believed a happy marriage was impossible, not now and not when I first sat down at the keyboard to write the opening lines of Mr. and Mrs. Fitzwilliam Darcy: Two Shall Become One. I didn’t merely hope it was true, I 100% knew it was possible to have a marriage that was fulfilling, contented, romantic, and passionate… even after several decades. I knew it because I witnessed it with others. I knew it because God said it was to be so. I knew it because I possessed such a marriage relationship.

Your smile stops the minutes
And as moments they dance in candlelight.
While your eyes whisper secrets,
My heart with wings takes flight.
In search for more of you to know,
Of why and what make you so,
Then mystery pleads her case
And once again I found your face.
There to know beauty true
And gentle winds of peace and love,
With eyes like jewels shining,
Looking to the One above.
And the moments which find life there
Become the brightest stars above,
Which live forever beautiful
In the sky of my heart’s love.”
~Steve Lathan, “Your Smile Stops the Minutes”

 

The poem above, in case the poet’s name didn’t leap out, was written by my husband. It was 1986, a few months before we married, and was the first poem he wrote for me. He has since written others, all beautiful, but this one will always be my favorite. So much so that with his permission, “Your Smile Stops the Minutes” was added to In the Arms of Mr. Darcy as a love poem written by Mr. Darcy for Elizabeth.

Now, writing poetry for one’s beloved does not necessarily translate into an eternally smooth marriage! As the old saying goes, if anyone tells you they never fight with their spouse or have never had any troubles, they are lying. Point is, encountering problems along the way does not negate the “happily ever after” goal. I happen to be very blessed with a super romantic husband who to this day (we are coming up on our 35th wedding anniversary) still brings we flowers for no reason, never forgets a special calendar day, spends way too much money on personal gifts, and, yes, still writes the occasional poem. Whenever a critic says I write Mr. Darcy too romantic, I just point to Mr. Lathan! Half of Darcy’s romantic phrases and overtures are stolen from my husband, like the poem above for example.

We’ve dealt with our fair share of trials, I assure you, yet here we are 35 years later and still going strong. Therefore, I knew the whole “happily ever after” thing was not a Mission: Impossible. I approached the life of Fitzwilliam and Elizabeth Darcy with this goal clearly in mind. The mission statement of The Darcy Saga has always been clear. Love. Romance. Passion. Those are the attainable treasures that Darcy and Elizabeth would pursue. Daily. Weekly. Monthly. Yearly. And maybe even on into eternity.

Come live with me and be my love,
And we will all the pleasures prove,
And I will make thee beds of roses,
And a thousand fragrant posies,
A cap of flowers and a kirtle
Embroidered all with leaves of myrtle;
The shepherd swains shall dance and sing
For thy delight each May morning;
If these delights thy mind may move,
Then live with me and be my love.
~Christopher Marlowe, “The Passionate Shepherd to His Love” 1599

 

Throughout my Darcy Saga series I have faithfully held to the ideal. I wanted to give Darcy and Lizzy the life that I believe Jane Austen intended. I wanted to allow the reader to journey along with them as they attended to their normal lives with an unusual event thrown in occasionally. I wanted to show the Darcys growing in their accord and deepening their love.

Time is too slow for those who wait, too swift for those who fear,
too long for those who grieve, too short for those who rejoice,
but for those who love, time is eternity.
~Henry van Dyke, “Time Is”

 

In the third novel of The Darcy Saga, My Dearest Mr. Darcy, the Darcys travel to the seacoast for a holiday jammed with history, entertainment, action, and romance. Of course! Then they return to Pemberley, settling in and enjoying the autumn months. The culmination of their first year of marriage draws near with the birth of their first child on the horizon. As with all my novels, the theme is positive with the love between these two heightening as they await the addition to their family. So much so, that even longtime bachelor Colonel Richard Fitzwilliam begins to rethink his commitment to a solitary life. On a ride to London with his cousin, Richard blurts out the question: “What is it like, Darcy, to love as you do?” After a bit of teasing from Darcy, the topic is discussed seriously….

“Why do you ask about love?”

Richard shrugged, gazing out the window. “Primarily idle curiosity. You have been so different since Elizabeth entered your life. I noted a change in your demeanor as far back as Rosings last, although I did not comprehend the cause. The oddity is that I thought you perfectly content before, yet now I observe the two of you together, and even how you fondle your new ring, and the happiness is transparent. Nauseatingly so.” He grinned and shrugged again. “So I was curious what it felt like.”

Darcy was gazing into his lap with a soft smile upon his mouth, self-consciously removing fingertips from the gold band. He did not answer hastily, finally speaking lowly, “I do not know if I can sufficiently place it into words. Perhaps that is why the poets wax eloquent with platitudes and analogies as mere common phrases do not suffice. All I know for certain is that almost from the moment I saw her she has filled my senses and my heart. There is joy with Elizabeth in every way and every moment, whether present or no. I feel light and buoyant, yet also grounded and secure. Giddy and frivolous, yet strong and steady. Childish and masculine simultaneously.” He chuckled softly, closing his eyes and leaning back against the carriage wall. “Yet you know what the most miraculous part is, Richard? Greater than how she makes me feel is the miracle that she loves me.”

He opened his eyes abruptly, staring at his cousin with full Darcy intensity. “Richard, there is no replacement for that. It is a priceless treasure, and I only wish all in the world could experience it.”

 

Sappy my novels may be, but if I convince a few skeptics that happily ever after can come true, it is worth it! One thing I am sure of is succeeding in my mission: The Darcys are still in love, are passionate for each other, delight in being together, respect and honor their vows, and are not ashamed to express their feelings.

True love… Everlasting love… Passionate love..
These are goals to reach for, don’t you agree?
Your thoughts are always welcome!

 

15 Responses to Do you believe in Happily Ever After? The poets did!

  1. I certainly believe that happy marriages are possible as I’ve seen many great relationships including my parents but I believe it really is a matter of compatibility.

  2. What a lovely post. I nearly cried I was so touched. Shortly before my mom passed away, my parents were able to celebrate their 60th anniversary. When my husband first received his cancer diagnosis, he told the doctor that if he lived two years, we’d celebrate our 50th anniversary. That date is later this year and he is now in remission. We are blessed and we certainly do not take life lightly. I loved this touching post and appreciate all that you have said. The years fly by and we often wonder where the time went. Life is good. God is good and I wish you much happiness and health. Blessings.

    • Praise God for your husband’s remission! That is a marvelous blessing. I know how scary the Big C is, been there myself twice with a positive resolution. Sounds like you have two marvelous love stories in your life as an example to others. Thanks for sharing. And, early happy anniversary wishes!

  3. I absolutely believe in happily ever after! I’m still looking for mine( fingers crossed it will happen someday). How sweet of your husband to write you a poem!So romantic!

  4. My husband and I will celebrate our 38th anniversary in June. There are constantly new joys and sorrows, challenges and triumphs, but we face them together, as a team. Our shared faith in God is the center of our marriage and provides peace in our crazy tumultuous times. Romance isn’t just poetry and moonbeams, it’s the neck rub when I’ve overdone the yardwork and the cold water and floppy hat when he’s mowing the lawn.
    I enjoy escaping into Darcy and Elizabeth’s world from time to time, but I’m pretty pleased with the romance I’m living in, too !

    • Oh boy, are you SO right! Sure, we females love the flowers and gifts (especially chocolate!) but nothing says true love better than being taken care of when ill or the seemingly “little” things done for no reason. Steve does such gestures all the time. The big one for me that shows his love is him taking the dogs out for the early morning lawn-visit because this old night shift RN is SO not a morning person!

  5. Your husband is an accomplished poet. Plus, I am sure he had the very best possible inspiration. That poem was just lovely.

    It’s coming up to nearly 30 years for us as well. It’s hard to believe. Everyone thought we were babies when we got married, and I know a few people scratched their heads at the time. We were both still at university and didn’t have two cents to rub together, but we knew almost from the first time we met that this was something special.

    Happily Ever After is definitely possible.

    • Thank you Riana. Yes, he is very good. He was inspired by his growing feelings for me, yes, but the poem itself came into his head while we were sitting in a restaurant on Ghirardelli Square in San Francisco. Great memories!

      Congratulations on 30 years! When it is right, it is just right, no matter how old or the timing.

  6. What a beautiful and inspiring post! My husband and I are going strong at nearly 37 years. It was love at first sight for both of us, but it hasn’t always been easy! For us, I think it has a lot to do with similar backgrounds, mutual goals, excellent examples of successful marriages among our parents, respect, passion, and yes, a “little help” from above.

    • I love to hear of longtime happy marriages!! Personally, I think it happens far more than we are lead to believe.

      I can’t claim it was love at first sight for me. Long story. But it was for Steve. He can still remember exactly what I was wearing when we met in 1985.

  7. Oh, yes, I believe it can be achieved with love and effort. I achieved some of it with my second husband. Unfortunately, he was nearly killed in a motorcycle accident when a kid pulled out in front of him. In spite of two years recovering, we did manage to have a measure of it. Anything worthwhile begs for effort and a lot of love. BTW he also wrote poetic prose. <3

    • So sorry to hear of your husband’s accident, Gianna. I had no idea! Such trial as that are so horrific that, to me, it is obvious there is divine intervention to get through. I speak from personal experience with my husband and can assure that God brought us through the darkness. But even if a marriage isn’t attacked in a dramatic way, there are some problems to overcome. It can definitely be done!

      So nice you have poems written for you. When Steve gave me the poem above, I honestly was so overwhelmed I didn’t know what to say or how to act! I’d had few boyfriends who gave a card or flowers for Valentine’s Day or whatever, so a whole poem was beyond my wildest imaginings! He teases me about it now, but my uncomfortable “How nice, thanks” kind of response definitely threw him at the time! LOL!!

      • I forgot to add that the accident occurred 11 months into our marriage. Seven weeks I stayed with him in the hospital not knowing if I would even have a one year anniversary.

Leave a reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.